I miss you already, I miss you always.

Feeling a bit like I should be doing something.
Cancelled comedy show, it has already begun.
Saturday night in London, my second last night,
and all I want to do is take sleeping tablets,
and finish reading my book, even though at the
same time I feel like I'm cheating this holiday
by being boring.
I just don't feel like going out again,
on my own.

I feel regretful and sad about M.
I want to be spooning him in bed.
I don't know how he feels about that,
and I'd like to know.

We're so bad for each other and yet so good.
I can't imagine life without him there.
If I get the chance, I think I'm going to
really try to be a better person to him.