M comes around and whispers to
everyone except me to go into the bosses office.
-If you want to talk about me, you could
have just told me to leave?
"You have to come too".
We go into the bosses room.
"Someone, I don't know who it was,
asked K (Big Boss) for work, whilst I was
away, now, this is very wrong as it looks like
we haven't got enough work and we might loose staff
members, I know we have been quiet, if you haven't got
work to do, then you just need to ask and we'll find some".
Everyone looks uncomfortable,
the boss, looking smug, pretending she's good cop.
When we all know she's just a fucking bitch.
- It was me, you were both away,
I was sick of reading procedures.
Jesus.
What kind of workplace tells you off
for asking for work?
"Also I've noticed a bit of noise coming
from you, so if I walk past, and say Shhh,
you just keep the noise down a bit".
I want to be noisy and scream:
-I wish an elephant had killed you in Thailand!
But who'd pay my rent?
Today I took my visual diaries in to show people,
most people didn't have time,
J had a look and told me I was really talented,
and I should persue something creative.
I really need people like him around me.
He also said "Get yourself set up here,
save a bit of money, but keep it in the back of
your mind, then start searching for what you want to do".
He told me he had depression a few years ago.
I didn't really like him at first,
but now I think he's more like me than
I like to admit to.
I hate the arses at work that want to give him
2 leaving parties.
-Two?
"One for him, and one for us after he's gone, to celebrate".
I walked away from this conversation and
out onto the street.
I have no idea who these people are.
Another odd situation,
at art class I was talking about
living alone to M, who agreed with
how great it was, how its so much easier,
but also bad too,
how I'd just booked a trip back to Brisbane
for Christmas, but I'm not going to tell anyone
I'm going (aside from family),
because, well its just easier not to,
and because I don't want to be guilted into
seeing people.
M said "You sound so much like me,
its unbelieveable".
(-Do I? What did I just say?
Will I say it tomorrow?)
You'd think after spending so much
time alone I'd know myself a little bit better.
After work today,
I went along with M to a charity
function at Richmond,
I was promised Turkish Delight & Henna painting.
Inside the town hall
was a few refugees
who'd made handcrafted bits of rubbish,
knitted booties, jumpers, shawls,
crochetted table runners, doilies,
beaded jewellery.
It was all a little uncomfortable,
I wasn't going to buy things I'd
only put in the charity bin outside.
I had Turkish Delight, which was brilliant
and we had our hands painted... see.
Mine is on the right,
and I smudged it getting my mirror
out of my bag to see if I had
Turkish Delight on my face.
Never mind.
Whilst I was outside this little
boy followed me,
I was going down the stairs so I helped him,
as I didn't want him to fall,
his mum came out and told him in Turkish to
go back in side.
She probably also said "She's a stranger".
Anyway he kept following me, so I smiled sympathetically
at his mum, you know the
'ah what a funny kid, not listening' look.
She was expressionless.
I nearly said -Put your kid on a fucking lead then.
Then this other Turkish woman put on a jingly belly dancing
belt thing, and got up on stage whilst her daughter,
played some Turkish hits on her Yamaha keyboard.
It was very sad.
I can do a better Beyonce bum wiggle than her,
but alas there was no alcohol,
only Baklava, and other countries' assorted foods.
I took my cue by the door,
when the Vietnamese lady got up and
sang a couple of tragic numbers.
Jesus, I don't care if they're poor.
They're a talentless bunch of weirdos.
M and her mother who's a nun,
who I found wouldn't talk to me much,
left also.
I was stranded in Richmond.
I walked to the tram stop,
and wondered if my smudgy hennad hand
and the 'delight was worth it.
By the way, I know lots of people
who's name begins with M,
so this probably doesn't make sense.
The first was my team leader.
The second was my newest friend,
who comes to art class and
the third is a work colleague.
P.S For Christmas I want
a drum kit and a xylophone.
(Not the crocodile shaped one from K-Mart).
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